The summer is coming to an end, and I dread it the way we dread an old friend moving to the far side of the country. Yes, it has been a brutally hot summer for this region, and wildfires are burning all over the Northwest. The majority of the locals are praying for rain and the cooler temps of autumn. Yes, we need the rain, we are in a drought. Yes, I agree, a few good days of rain would do us all a world of good. But I am not ready for summer to pass me by.
And that is the point: I feel that summer has passed me by. Last winter I had glorious plans of what would happen this summer. Of course, the first dream was a repeat of my race of last season, the Epic 250K. With the cancellation of the event, that dream was derailed, and it took me a bit to regain my focus. I switched gears, went from training focused to play focused; hiking, races with my friends, climb a g'damned mountain, and capping it with a half-Iron in September. Well, my knee injury during the first race of the season caboshed those plans. I still haven't run, even my cycling has had to take a back-burner while I recovered. So, no races with friends, no hiking, and no mountain climbing. All my plans and schemes were dropped on their heads. Now, here it is, the end of August, and I am feeling as if I were deprived of so much. I did not get to go out and play like I had planned. I am struggling with a combination of post-season depression, injury caused depression, and the dread of winter looming.
This time of year is always a bit of a struggle for me, I won't lie. As one who likes/needs to have plans, and always looks ahead, I know what is waiting. Cold, dark, wet. To counter this I am pushing hard to finish my Fort. The space that started as a whim. Actually, the project that started as a need to replace rotten siding on the south end of the building. It has taken on a life of its own. I am just a few weeks out from completion, I think. This space, my Fort, my Fortress of Solitude, my studio, has come to be a beacon of hope to help me power through the dark days of winter. It will be my workshop. No, not for messy projects. It will be Brains studio. It will be my writing space. Not connected to the internet, no distraction of Netflix, no workout gear staring at me from across the room. It will be where I go to think, write, read, decompress, meditate. Brain and Spirit will reign supreme in their own private retreat. It will not be a party space. It will not be open to the public. Yes, it will make a great guest house, which was its original purpose, once the whole project got underway, and before I decided it was turning into an epic space.
So now, as autumn looms, with winter close behind, I have to make a valiant push to get the project finished. Even as I continue to train for races that won't happen, building Body to keep Brain and Spirit sheltered is more important at this time of year, just for my own sanity. I still feel as if summer has passed me by, but it has been a crazy busy season after all.