Thursday, June 7, 2018

A Drop in The Ocean

    It has been so long since I've written. So much happening and yet so much seems to feel like the Hamster on a Wheel. Changing jobs, again. Financially insecure, as usual. Still wondering what do I want to be when I grow up (though I doubt that question will ever be answered to my satisfaction). Happily single, mostly. Raging against the Machine, as always.
     In this time of political and social unrest I often feel like my problems are small by comparison. A Drop in the Ocean. But since it is my life the problems loom with the barometric pressure of a thunderstorm. Stepping back and looking at the big picture though, it is easy to see how my problems are intertwined with the problems of the world. The global stresses press down on all of us, creating anxiety and insecurity. We fear where we are going, what our children and grandchildren will be facing if we can't manage to pull back from the brink of causing our own mass extinction.
    Stepping back from the global picture, because again, each of us is a mere drop in the ocean if we look too large, there is nothing I can do at this moment to save a beached whale dying from a belly full of plastic. What I can do, on my very small scale is use less plastic, be responsible for my one little drop. I can't stop gun violence in Chicago, but I can practice peace and love in my little drop. I can't change the climate back to pre-industrial purity, but I can use less plastic, plant for pollinators and wildlife, use water sparingly, find alternatives to toxic products. be responsible for my little drop.
    I see movements all around the globe of small groups doing one small thing. A grass roots company in Kenya that takes discarded flip-flops that wash up on the beach by the thousands and uses them to create beautiful animal sculptures. Surfers who have designed a machine that skims the ocean collecting garbage. Children who make dolls for other children who need that bit of kindness. Volunteers around the world who help feed and care for those in need. Nothing is an insurmountable problem if you break it down into tiny drops.
     In my own life I try to make myself step back from the overwhelming big picture, and break the problems down into drops. Some days it works better than others. There are times that the stress of day to day existence becomes more than I can handle, and I allow myself a breakdown, allow myself to step back from responsibility and reality for a little while. Even then I find my mind starts looking for the avenues of escape, the paths to change, or at least a skinny trail to assess the possibilities of digging myself out of the current dilemma enough to get my head above ground level. Some days all it takes is to go outside and water the plants. Other days it is a monumental effort. But even a small effort is better than despair, better than complacency, and far better than surrendering to what sometimes feels like the inevitable. Few things are inevitable. Small changes can realign the world.
     One thing I do know, even if it is just a Drop in the Ocean, a million drops can be a flood. Be the Drop.