Friday, January 3, 2014
Relax And Let Go
It came about gradually. Snuck up on me, actually. The feeling of forgiveness. There are parts of my past that I thought would likely always inhabit a black, bitter place in my heart. That smudge on my karma, the bleak spot that is the root of bitterness and anger. That bleak little smear has somehow managed to shrivel up and blow away. It is gone. Yes, there are still the residual self-esteem issues, but those have their own place in my heart, and seem to get a jolt of fertilizer every now and then, so they keep managing to hang on and torment me. But those feelings are far different from the bitterness, hostility and anger that had been so much a part of me for so long that I was sure they would never leave. I am not even sure when they did finally drift away, it was so gradual, like the moment you realize that a nagging headache has stopped nagging. Normally I would analyze and over analyze this phenomena, but not this time. I think I shall just accept it for what it is, peace and quiet, serenity in my soul, tranquility. Maybe I worked so hard to try and force a healing, that when I finally relaxed, accepted it as part of who I am, that that was what was really needed to release the negativity and let it dissipate on the wind. Relax and let go. I'm not going to question it, just accept it. Relax, and let go.